Above: Choon-Ha Cho, our grandfather, whose Jesa day is May 29.

Below: Bum Lee, our grandmother, whose Jesa day is 
July 28.

In Korean culture, the anniversary of a parent's death is memorialized in an annual ceremony known as (pronounced "je-sah").

The ceremony actually goes back to Chinese Confucianism, in which the dead are honored by the family of the living.

During the ceremony, photographs of the deceased are placed on a table, along with a variety of attractively prepared food. A door is opened, to allow the spirits of the deceased into the house. Members of the family then stand before the table and bow -- the men bow twice and the women bow four times.

For several minutes, the deceased are remembered through stories and anecdotes. The head of the family then dips a spoon into a bowl of rice that sits in front of the photograph of each person being honored. He scoops out a spoonful of rice and lays it in a small bowl of water. This is to signify that the deceased has eaten. More remembrances are made, and then there is a final round of bowing, which concludes the ceremony.

The traditional ceremony is actually much more elaborate than the one just described. Traditionally, the ceremony is performed at midnight by the eldest son of the eldest son, and every member of the extended family is required to attend.